sunshine_shaman

06:48 pm: Not Coo.

The last long hour of work on Saturday was in no way improved by the events that happened during that time today. Firstly, the beautiful day outside got even more gorgeous as the sun began to drift westward while I was stuck inside.
 
Second, I had a run-in with a knife.
"GIVE ME YOUR BLOOD!!!!" it demanded maniacally as it drove itself deep into my middle right finger. I don't know how I happened, because I was reaching for the handle of the stupid thing, but somehow... there it was. Chuckling to itself. A smile on its steely countenance. Crimson with my blood. "Oh." I said, moving toward the back to find a sink and the first aid kit. Yellow (my coworker- I have given them each a code name to protect their identities) glowered at me. "Well," She growled, "I just cleaned that knife. Now look what you did."  I nodded, making sure to take the aggressor knife with me. I quickly moved to the back where I got my wound all fixed up. It hurt. a lot.

Last, and certainly not least, in the last five minutes of work, a party of three busted their way into the store. They proceeded to barge around the store unshelving things, make a hefty order of deli goods (after Blue and I had just finished cleaning off the slicers) ask for samples of cheeses they didn't end up getting, and making a large mess of everything. And I don't care how much you paid the store, or if I got paid overtime, an apology for coming in 5 minutes before closing is not satisfactory.
As I felt the minutes slide away and the hour of 5 roll by I sliced their meats and cheeses with a smile pasted on my face.
One of the ladies said, "Sorry we're making you do this. You should be home by now, huh?" I answered, "Oh... that's just fine." Adding a smile for touch. I was really thinking about unleashing a hellish fury upon them. Good thing I don't have any superpowers... I would've eye blasted them like Cyclops if I could...

But other than that last hour. The day was fine. Nothing much to report except that people bought sandwiches and groceries and paid for them. All day.

 

 

10:59 pm: I can't help myself....
Ok.... ok.... I can't stop now. I'm just having too much fun. I'll stop posting these silly scraps soon. But for now... enjoy this one... :D



And in other news... I've learned that 3D glasses look awesome in pictures. They are suuuper reflective and look all white and badass when you shine light on them right. This prompted me to take a series of pictures with them on. this one was the best.



And that black spot on my chest is a mole. Not anything special. But for some reason... the computer really wanted to accent it.

09:53 pm: More Shuper Hero Shtuff
Oook ooook. So. I'm thinking that last night's dream came from the fact that I'm a giant super hero geek I'm watching the Xmen animated series. But today, as I was watching some more Xmen... I realized a couple things. First: Storm speaks in all caps. Even when she is doing mundane things she must say it in the loudest, gravest voice imaginable (see fig. 1). Second: Wolverine has the best disguises evar! (fig 2) I mean, who else do you know can sneak by enemy forces wearing only sunglasses and a baseball hat?



figure 1



figure 2

(ps: sorry for the poor quality of the pictures. My scanner does not take kindly to pencil drawings.)

09:44 pm: Dreamland Sitcoms
I had the most wonderful dream last night. Here, I'll tell you:

Ok. So. In a dorm type situation, many super heroes (DC, Marvel, and others alike) get together to fight crime or something like that. I'm not sure about the logistics of the whole situation. All I know is that Gambet and Batman had to share a room. Now, they are not the most compatible roomies and they do not take kindly to this situation. The dream was them squabling about what decorations to put all over the walls and who gets what side of the room. They both really, really want the same side of the room and were ready to bust out their super-hero powers to obtain it. After much mayhem and fighting, they solve the problem by connecting the beds to make a really good bunk bed. Batman claims the top bunk, leaving Gambet quite dismayed.

I liked the dream so much I drew a little picture of it.


This dream gave me big, big ideas about these two heroes. If this unlikely duo ever did happen, I'm thinking it would be a pretty awesome relationship. Something like Bert and Ernie. Bats would be perpetually unimpressed with Gambet who would spend his time just trying to piss off Bats. There's a sitcom in this. I know it!

10:16 pm: Goin' On A Walk Outside Today
Some pictures from today

( Under here... )

11:22 pm: OH. MY. GAWD.
THERE
IS
A
MAN
IN
THE
PHONEBOOK
NAMED

GARY BOOGER!

BEST
THING
EVAR!!!!

05:09 pm: Takin' A Walk
Lately, I've been taking short little walks outside and taking some pictures. Here are a few of the good one:


Fern the Fat Cat likes to stalk me on my walks.


It's a little blurry... But I like it that way.


"Badass" is the word you're looking for on this one.


Not the best, but I really liked the spider web overtaking the little yellow flower...


I love taking these little things apart.


It's kinda dark, but I think that makes it look cooler. The non-darkened one just looks like a normal, boring mountain. This one looks interesting and mysteriously shady...


I wish the sun had been out for this one.... I'll just have to go up the mountain again. ;)



This beauty needs no words. No words.

09:20 pm: I FUCKING LOVE SANDWICHES!!!!
About two weeks ago, I started an adventure into a new job. I now am part of the crack squad occupying a local Italian Sandwich and Deli - which, from now on, I will be referring to as Sandwich! so the stalkers out there will never figure out my true whereabouts.... It's a pretty awesome job and I'm enjoying it so far. And in my short two weeks of working there, I have made some observations:

1. Old men are gross. They wink, they ogle, they leer, they make gross comments, and are, in general, an off-putting crowd.

2. Weekends no longer apply. Sure, I get a couple days off a week, it no longer matters which two.

3. Lunch rocks when you can have anything you want in a gourmet Italian food store.

4. My new hobby is the Deli Slicer. I was given the task of preparing the lettuce and tomatoes for the sandwiches, and after the initial fear of chopping off a finger passed, I became a force that could not be stopped. Lettuce ran for its life when it saw me coming. No tomato was safe from my round blade of death. I lusted to see the tomato juice splash on the cold steel of spinning doom. I longed to see the leaves of lettuce torn asunder and ripped in twain by my destructive power. All the while, my boss had to deal with me crying out periodically, "I AM GOD OF THE VEGETABLES! FEAR ME!"

5. Lettuce is like the herpes of sandwich makings. While making the sandwiches, it gets all over the table, in the other bowls of veggies and sandwich makings, and it sticks to anything and everything. There is no way of avoiding lettuce, and there is no cure.

6. You can make really fun flavors of Italian soda, like "raspberry peach" or "pomegranate cheesecake" or "chocolate mint" or "molasses boysenberry peppermint" or "vanilla lime strawberry fruit punch!"

7. It's fun to rate people's voices on the phone when the call in orders, and then see what they really look like when they pick up their stuff.

8. Garbage duity will be the death of me.

9. So will the cash register.

04:08 pm: Finals...
Well... In a matter of minutes, I will be packing off to go join the ranks of many fellow students to partake in an event known to all as "finals week." I have been studying my ass off for days to be able to ace them. My math one is today. Only now did I start stressing about it. I have studied, read over my notes, and worked out some practice questions and I'm feeling ready. The looming pessimist in the back of my head begs to differ, though. As I packed up all my study items, a large butterfly began to grow in my heart and I am worried it won't go away.

So as I battle to calm myself... wish me luck.

03:52 pm: Wednesday Off
College is winding down for the summer. Just need to finish out this week (or what's left of the classes therein...) and then hand in a paper that's in the works and do two finals next week. GAH!

But today was surprisingly mellow. I didn't have my English class today, so I decided to take the day off and prepare a little for the upcoming shitstorm of tests and papers. It was a beautifully sunny spring day today and I felt compelled to spend the day outside doing all my homework. So... naturally, like the fool that I am, got a wickedly bad sunburn on my shoulders and back. It's the second time in a couple weeks that this has happned, and I'm kicking myself for staying in the sun for that long sans sunscreen. (How often and how badly do sunburns need to be to develop cancer of the skin?)

Also, on my beautiful Wednesday off, I listened to The Decemberists' new CD, "The Hazards of Love" a few more times. Now, I'm kind of a fair weather fan of theirs. Their overly Indie sound sometimes grates on me, and the main dude can often sound a little whiny. I like them well enough, and have a good amount of their stuff on my iPod. But they were on the Colbert Report the other day pushing their new record and when I heard the song they played, I immediately had to buy it. And WOW! They have outdone themselves. They have created a rock/metal/folk mixture that is breathtaking. Listen to the disc in order, and you are rewarded with the treat of an epicly awesome story being played out within the lyrics. I, for one, cannot get enough of it. Aparently, it's based off of an old fairy tale, that I'm dying to know so I can possibly read it and get all their details. I really like how they broke away from their mushy Indie sound and tried out this new something, and I desperately hope that they keep trying new things. Seriously. Have a listen. You'll see what I mean.

12:38 am: Thoughts During A Math Test
Here is a list of thoughts during the math test this evening:

Pre-test: "Leg is twitching. I'm excited! Let's get this test ON!"

Beginning of test: "Totally spelled my name right! Booyah! Now, onto the mathz."

After skipping a few problems that should be easy, because this subject is easy: "Well, I'm dumb."

After furiously working through several more questions, possibly flubbing an answer or two: "Not one hour ago, I was totally ready for this. Huh. Where did the knowledge go?"

3/4 of the test later: "Shit! Shit! The time, it runs out! And my eyes, why, why do they water like this?"

A couple seconds later: "I didn't think I put that much eye makeup on today... and now look at it... the stuff is everywhereI Better snuffle quietly so nobody hears me. Fuck these imaginary numbers. I'm running out of led. Shit. Fuck."

But twenty minutes left: "Well... I'm hosed. Why did I think this stuff was easy, again? My hand is shaking."

Last problem: "Let me die. The teacher's staring at me. My face is all red, and covered in this stupid mascara. I look like an ass. Stop torturing yourself and hand this shit in. You're not going to get any sort of stroke of genius now..."

Handing the test in: "Yeah, that's right. In the front of this big class. Crying my eyes out. I'm an idiot - in math and for crying like this. Stupid."

When guy who was handing his test in at the same time as me touched my arm consolingly and gave me a smile, but I just walked on: "Thank you. That was nice."

Running to car, still weeping: "That guy was nice. I should've smiled back at him."

12:24 am: If you give Claire a Venti coffee….
If you give Claire a Venti coffee, she will try to find a place to put it on her desk. Realizing she has no room on her desk, she will clear away a spot for the coffee by throwing a good portion of garbage away. Some of it will fall on the floor as she brings it to the garbage can on the other side of her room. As she stoops to pick up the garbage, she will notice that there is an awful lot of stuff cluttering up the floor. After hanging up her clean clothes, starting a fresh load of laundry, and putting all her College books away, she will focus on the coat of grime sitting on the floor. Disgusted with her lack of personal hygiene – and realizing that all this dust and particles on the floor can not be helping her allergies –  she finds the vacuum and furiously cleans the floor. To see if she got it all, Claire will open the blinds of her window, and will see that there is a spider colony situated in between the shutters and the window itself. Quickly, she will vacuum up the webs, and get a shot of fear through her veins, when she thinks of what might have just fallen onto her bed. She will rush to go get clean sheets, but stops at the sink in the bathroom to rid her hands of the spider stuff with a hefty amount of soap. While washing her hands, she spots all the water gunk and grossness all over the bathroom counter and mirror. Hurriedly, she will scrub and scour the hell out of the little room. After, she will wash her hands thoroughly, and remember that she needed clean sheets. When she finishes making the bed, Claire will flop down on it, sleepily, needing a quick boost of energy. That is when she remembers that she has a Venti cup of powerful coffee…….

10:57 pm: Interesting Occupations For Vegetarians
My vegetarian friend in Spanish class and I were talking today and got onto the subject of what job he will get after college. This lead us to an odd convo about curious jobs vegetarians can have.

So here it is, folks, our list of Interesting Occupations For Vegetarians:

- Top hat maker - "We don't eat the beavers. Just make 'em into hats."

- Serial killer - "People can go. Just don't hurt the animals.

- Lion tamer - "I only whip them."

- Fur collector - "Because wearing them is a lot different."

- Entomologist - "Bugs don't count."

- Slaughterhouse architect - "Hey, I'm not the one killin' them..."

- Roadkill cleanup crew

- Gun salesperson

- Taxidermist

09:10 pm: More Things I Learned
What I learned today:

There is no possible way in the world to look like a badass while drinking lemonade from a water bottle with a straw.  No. Way.

10:01 pm: Things I learned.
This has been a busy, busy week. I have learned many things these times as well.

- If there is ever a dangerous, actually dangerous, threat on college, we everybody over there is doomed. DOOMED! In a minor gas leak near college, everything was evacuated. This evac. got to us about an hour after the leak started (at least) and once I learned of this, I spent upwards of 2 hours trying to get out of the parking lot. College needs to try and make more than one exit to a parking lot that holds thousands of cars - and lives.

- Ian McKellen (sp?) makes a killer King Lear.

- There is actually a movie made of Titus Andronicus. It's now on my movie queue.

- People like my photography. You can see some of  it <a href="here.">http://sunshine-shaman.deviantart.com/</a> 

- People on Deviantart are nice people. (so far as I've met...)

- Despite its action scenes and camera acrobatics, Quantum of Solace is a boring, boring movie.

- It's harder than you'd think to liberate files from a braindead computer.

- I want to become a make-up floozie at the mall. I think I could be a killer saleswoman in the trade of fancy paints and smelly chemicals.

- Somewhere out there in the big world, a jesus salesperson is praying for my everlasting soul.

- In this economy, Hit Man is a pretty good job idea. Somebody will always want somebody else killed.

- There are two interesting sub-generes in the movie world: The "Scary House" genre, and the "Jason Statham + Cars" genre.

- I want David Attenborough to be my grandpa.

- Snow needs to melt by Febuary. Any time after that... it drives people nuts.

- You can actually miss playing an instrument if you haven't played it in a while.

- There are only 5 weeks left this semester. Summer is nigh.

- This has been a good week. :)

01:54 am: Soul Searching
This week was my spring break (Woo!) week. Nothing much has happened other than some lazy days spent with family and Kriz10. During this time, I have done what many may classify as "soul searching." There has been a lot of down time for me to take time and just think. Here is what I have realized:

I have been living my life like the little boy from The Incredibles. Robert Parr, or the once famous Mr. Incredible accosts a little boy who keeps appearing on his Big-Wheel, watching Robert intently. Bob cries angrily "Well, what are you waiting for?!" in a moment of anger at the world for being so very uneventful. The boy shrugs and replies, "I dunno! Something amazing... I guess." I have been waiting all through high school for my "something amazing" to happen. I realize that this was a fantasy, but I spent so many hours fantasizing about what college would be. How I would leave home and get a taste of soemthing different. Now that I'm back home after one horrid semester abroad, I have fallen back into the same routine I had for so many years of my life. I do the same things and I go to the same places. The dream I had for when I went away for school was the dream of doing different things. I was waiting for that amazing upheval in my life where I would be some other place doing other things. Now that I'm back home, I'm just the same. I'm still the Claire I was in high school, doing the same very mundane things from day to day. Living at home feels like a purgatory. I'm trapped in routine that I cannot get out from under. And these college years are supposed to be a person's "glory years." I feel like I'm stuck under a really big rock and I'm trying to push it off my chest. I feel like a machine in a factory that makes the exact same motions over and over, each and every day.

Which is why I have decided to make some changes.

I do not want to keep waiting for the change to come to me. I don't want to continue loafing about this house feeling sorry for the dream that didn't quite pan out. The lament is over. I was told this week to "grow up" that I'm not acting like a real adult staying at home like this. I've given those words a lot of thought. And the person who said this is right. I'm stuck in a world that is, in a way, holding me back. I have decided to do some growing up. I'm going to start getting in shape. I'm going to try harder to pull my weight around this house. I will get a summer job this year. I'm going to try and like college, even though this has been, by far, the worst year of my entire life. I'm going to adjust my attitude and try not to be so angry. That's my "somthing amazing."

I once had a conversation with a really smart person who adamantly believes that you can go to sleep one night and wake up a completely new person the next day. I argued and refuted this beyond belief. But now, I'm thinking that this person was right. I'm going to wake up tomorrow and change my attitude, and therefore myself. I am going to try and grow up. This hate-fest that has been going on for the past months will stop. It's all going to change. And if I can actually pull this off... that will be the amazing thing.

01:30 pm: Spring
A note to all you little ladies on campus:

Yes. The sun is shining.

Yes. It could be considered "Spring."

Yes. It's warming up.

No. It's still too cold to wear your short shorts. Put something warm on before you freeze to death because of sheer vanity. We'll see your spray-tan legs soon enough. Just be patient.

08:27 pm: Balance...
My mother has always taught me that life is all about seeking balance. Balance in foods, moods, good vs. bad, movies - everything. But, somehow... in my Freshman year of college, I seem to have chosen the two polar opposites in the spectrum of colleges:

Santa Cruz: There, in that fancy free school, I spent my days explaining to my drunken roomies things like: "A Brita doesn't work like that. You can't filter the carbs out of beer."

Utah: The world here is so impossibly prudish that there is a poster for the movie, "Sex Drive" up in one of the buildings, and somebody decided to censor the poster by putting up a large piece of paper over the word "sex." Bad words shouldn't be displayed so openly - especially in a scholarly setting.

Where did I go wrong? Why, in this life of finding balances, have I chosen these two crazy opposites?

11:16 pm: Yeah. I take notes.
We are doing a Poetry unit in one of my English classes. I take detailed notes during the poetry portion of any English class. For example, these are the notes I took during the discussion of the poem "The Fish" by Elizabeth Bishop:



As you can see, these notes contain a hefty amount of written text about the poem. First of all, it is "a complete story loaf." It has a good beginning and a solid ending. Next, "Punctuation" is important. That's why it's underlined (you should read these notes, e.e. cummings....) Next the speaker and the fish share a "kinship of crappiness" - an important literary observation. And finally, there was the word "bilge" somewhere within the body of the poem. My mind ended up making it into a soft drink (and you know it's funny, since I put a smily face next to it). After that, I took some copious notes on various fish archetypes as seen in the intellectual graphic. (The crab is the Christ Figure, by the way.)

10:35 pm: DEATH RACE!
So, I tried to tell my sister about the DEATH RACE! movie experience:

"Yeah," She said knowingly, "The one with the machine gun race cars...."

"Oh!" I cried, "But you never saw the semi truck with guns! And flame throwers! And a tank glued to the top of it! Awesome!" 

My sister just rolled her eyes. 

Few people will understand the killer awesomeness that is DEATH RACE!